Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Baseball field is no place for mother's intuition

A chilly rain was trickling down, and I was standing in the grass, watching as my son grabbed a bat and walked confidently to home plate. He'd been doing so well on his baseball league - I really had no reason to worry.

But suddenly, I was worried. Call it mother's intuition, call it a psychic flash. I saw in my mind's eye a baseball crashing into my little boy's face. It was so startling, I actually strode forward to the fence.

I was only a few seconds early.

I got there just in time to see it really happen. The pitcher threw wild. The baseball hit my son's batting helmet then bounced off his shoulder. Luckily, the helmet has a protective cage that descends down over the eyes and the face - and that's where the ball struck.

"No!" I shouted before I could help myself.

The coach ran over and patted his shoulder; my boy just shook it off and jogged to first base. He looked over and gave me a thumbs-up. I gave him a weak smile in return.

The baseball field is no place for mother's intuition. I was rattled for the rest of the game.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Trip to Indy Speedway provides bonding time for dad and son

Last Sunday was Mother's Day, and it was wonderful. But last Saturday was Father's Day - actually Father-Son Day, and it was pretty great, too.

That was the day my husband and son traveled down from our home in Michigan to Indianapolis for the Indianapolis Motor Speedway's opening day. They watched the cars, ate a few track dogs, did a lot of walking and shopping and most importantly, spent a lot of time talking

The drivers were onsite, and my normally shy son ran here, there and everywhere gathering signatures in his autograph book from everyone - including his favorite driver, Will Power, who was nice enough to pose for a picture. It's one of my favorite photos - my boy looks absolutely thrilled.

It was the first time my little boy, an avid racing fan, had been to back to the track since seeing the televised fiery wreck in Las Vegas that killed Indy 500 champ Dan Wheldon. I was glad he could go there with his dad and talk about it, glad they could spend the day together just hanging out and having fun.

Father-Son day is almost as good as Mother's Day. Almost.


Monday, April 23, 2012

Spending special time with kids is worth every minute of a "Wallace and Gromit" marathon

My son is a boy's boy, a rough and tumble kid. He likes football, plays baseball, watches racing. He doesn't hold hands with mom much anymore, and he only says "I love you" at night.

So that's why I owe a big debt of gratitude to "Wallace and Gromit."

I don't know if you've seen this British series, but my kids love it. I think it's just okay - but I'll admit, it's growing on me.

There are "Wallace and Gromit" movies and "Wallace and Gromit" shorts, and they all revolve around the harrowing adventures of cheese-loving Wallace and his very intelligent dog Gromit.

There was a marathon of shows on the other night. My son came up to me as I wrote on the computer.

"Mom," he said. "Do you want to watch TV together in your room? 'Wallace and Gromit' is on!"

I couldn't jump out of my chair fast enough. We giggled, snacked and snuggled - me, the boy and about 20 Mario plushies - for hours. His sister, sometimes far too sophisticated for such things, even saw we were having a plushie party and joined in.

As my kids get older, these invitations don't come as often as they used to. I'll take as many as I can get. Even if I have to watch an entire "Wallace and Gromit" marathon.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

My mom role model: With bouncy curls and perfect pants, she's just like looking in a mirror. Yeah, kind of ...

I saw my mom role model today after I dropped my son off at school. She was walking in front of me in her cute little white capris and a matching spring jacket.

She had on those pert little socks that barely show above your tennis shoes, the ones that have the little balls that peek out from over the heels of your shoes.

I almost missed her; I was bent over, tucking my pants cuffs under because they were too long and I refused to wear heels. I didn't have on a cute spring jacket - I couldn't find one in the labyrinth that is our hall closet. In fact, I was wearing what my husband calls my "grandma sweater;" it was bequeathed to me years ago from a former cubicle mate who took pity on me when I, um, couldn't find a spring jacket.

My mom role model has bouncy curls and perfect makeup that she likely does not apply in the rear view mirror on the way to work.  A quick glance at her nails tells me that they are filed into nice ovals, that the thumb nail is not bitten to the quick from stress, and the other nails are not covered with weird white polish that was on sale for $5 at Sephora because, it turns out, it looks like White-Out.

My mom role model smiles at me when she walks by, and her teeth are white and shiny. She must not be a writer; she probably doesn't stay up late drinking lots of coffee and developing new plot lines.

I don't know her, per se. Well, okay, I don't know her at all.  But I bet we could be friends. As long as she doesn't have a twin. Because really, there's only so much perfection I can handle.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Through children's eyes, trip to the museum because almost as educational as the exhibit

The other day, we took the kids to the Henry Ford museum to see an exhibit on the Titanic. I couldn't wait - I've always been fascinated by the saga of the doomed ship: the heroism, the cowardice, all the events that had to coincide for the Titanic to meet her fate.

I didn't think the kids would get all of it, of course, but I knew at the very least there was an iceberg there - and I was betting they'd get a kick out of that. What I didn't count on was what they'd notice long before the doors to the exhibit even opened.

To get to the museum, we took a strip of highway I travel nearly every day to get to work. It's not pretty. It's bare and gritty, lined with vacant, weedy lots, run-down businesses and strip clubs.

It's a far cry from our peaceful, tree-lined subdivision. But I've seen the sights so often I don't even pay attention to them anymore.

But my kids did. "Who lives in those?" my daughter said, pointing to a dilapidated trailer court by the side of the road.

"Why are those there?" she wondered, pointing at old shopping carts at a deserted bus stop.

My daughter has always been kind-hearted. One time she went with me on a newspaper assignment to a food bank; she watched as the families lined up and loaded up their groceries. Still very young, she watched the kids clinging to their parents in the huge gymnasium.  Later, she asked me if she could learn to sew someday - maybe she could make teddy bears, she said, so that those kids could get one when they came in. "Everyone needs a teddy bear," she told me.

On the trip, she sat quietly in the back seat, watching the scenery. "This makes me sad," she said quietly, almost to herself.

It was sad - is sad. Sad, too, that I see it so often I'd almost stopped noticing it.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Life is uncertain: Hug your kids, say 'I love you,' and make the most of the time you have

I have a friend who just found out a relative's cancer has returned. The diagnosis isn't good - the doctors have given him four months to live.

The news was just beginning to sink in . "Four months," she told me. "That's basically a summer. One summer, and he'll be gone."

I know what she's going through - somewhat. Sometimes the people we think we'll have around us forever disappear in a heartbeat. Nearly seven years ago, my beautiful, fun-loving sister laid down with a terrible headache; days later, she was dead from a stroke.

Life is so transient, isn't it? We think we'll have so much time - to hug those kids, to take that trip, to write that book, to get that great job. But you just never know.

My friend is at a loss; I hate to see it. But she has the right attitude.

"I bought a bag of jelly beans the other day," she told me. "I felt so silly - but he loves jelly beans. I thought, 'There's not much I can do, really, but be there ... and I just want to make sure he has all the little things around him he likes.'"

She's right, I thought.  There's no guarantees. We can just surround ourselves with the people and the things we love and make the most of the time we have.

Then we cross our fingers and say our prayers.

Monday, March 26, 2012

Things you learn spending time with your teen-age daughter (Hint: watch your mouth)

You learn a few things when you go shopping with your teen-age daughter.

You learn that some of the most popular stores have incredibly loud music, really narrow aisles and lots of girls so skinny you could probably bench-press them.

You learn that the style of shorts that you wear on a regular basis is hopelessly uncool.

You learn that the one way to get your daughter to never, ever listen to a song again is to say that you heard it in Jazzercize.

And bizarrely, you learn that you're not allowed to say the word "panty." Go figure. Although it's plastered all over the windows of Victoria's Secret, if  it comes from your mouth, it's suddenly gross and inappropriate.

Instead, you must use the word "underwear." And even then, for goodness' sakes, use it sparingly and try not to talk really loud or make a scene. Don't even think about touching one of the bras.

But despite all that, you also learn that spending that one-on-one time with your daughter is an incredibly fun way to spend an afternoon. You know - as long as you watch your mouth.